Hatsuka
Hatsuka is Japanese for the 20th day. Today's date. Hatsukaichi translates to the 20th day market (ichi being market). A long time ago, they used to have a big market here on the 20th of every month thus giving the town it's name. Coincidentally, I said my goodbye speeches today to Hatsukaichi high school. How poetically dramatic is that? This morning I had to say something at the morning meeting to all the teachers. My friend Carly helped me write it in Japanese. I went in early to practice my pronunciation with one of the English teachers. I finished reading the speech and it seemed like I had it down ok. Then a few minutes before the meeting I realized that it was all happening. The leaving process was really beginning. And I started to cry right there in the vice-principals office. It wasn't just because I'm sad that I'm leaving. It was more about this whole experience and saying goodbye and thank you to the people that were a part of it. It's been such an amazing year and I'd like to think that I learned something and changed a little for the better. I hope that I've opened my eyes to new things and became stronger because of it. Closing a chapter on such an experience is a little bit emotionally draining and it all flooded into me when the reality of it all set in. I gave my speech ok. Started to get just a little teary but controlled it. I was scheduled to give a speech to all 1200 students later though. I was more nervous about that because I had to do it in English and Japanese. Even though I practiced a lot I think I messed up a bit. But the odd thing was, as I was reading my speech I wasn't nervous or sad. I wrote a good message in my opinion and I said the gist of what I meant. The moment I had been dreading for weeks was finally here. I said goodbye, not because I wanted to, but because I had to. I realized that I was going to have to let go of some of the things that I was still trying to hold on to. The students clapped and I got off the stage. I know this is just the beginning, and it's going to take long time for me to deal with everything, but I think I got just a little bit of closure today.

- posted by Chris @ 7:55 PM